If you have been in a relationship with a girl for several days already, you will probably soon have a conversation about a joint future. Even though the prospect of such a conversation only causes fear and boredom, it is the only way to know if your expectations are the same.
However, the main problem with this conversation is that it can embroil you. Luckily, though, you've stumbled upon our helpful guide on how to talk to your girlfriend about your future plans without ruining your relationship.
Try not to be vague about your relationship. If you don’t want to ruin everything, you shouldn’t say so: “I am not yet sure of our future. I need some more time to sort myself out and collect my thoughts. "
If you really don’t feel like you’ll be able to build a long-term relationship with this girl, then don’t pretend to be silent about your real feelings. Tell her directly what you think, otherwise it will only get worse later.
At the same time, do not be afraid of scandals and other showdowns. If you are honest and very tactful, she will react normally to your words.
Try something like this: “I want to devote the next few years to work. I love being with you, but I don’t want to plan anything serious until I’m on my feet. I want to be honest with you, so I'm talking about it now. "
Think hypothetically. You don't need to ask a girl about how she sees you in her future. This is a provocative question and a rather tense wording that is unlikely to contribute to sincerity.
Instead, try to say hypothetically, “When would you like to get married? What should be your future husband? Where would you like to live with him? " And stuff like that. Ask questions that interest you without direct references to yourself. Then you will surely be able to hear honest answers.
You don't have to discuss everything at once. Despite the fact that the conversation about the future is quite serious, you do not need to discuss all aspects of your life together at once.
You can calmly say, “Let's talk about this later,” or “Let's get back to this conversation in a few months, what do you think?” And that will be fine.
The main thing is to be honest and open when discussing such issues. Do not forget about the words "compromise" and "understanding", then everything should go smoothly.